Pig Win

"Penguin halts e-books sales to libraries" is a recent sample newspaper headline concerning the discontinuation by the publisher Penguin Group (USA) of selling e-books to libraries. Yet these headlines could be much more invigorating. Here are some possibilities.

"Penguin Gives Libraries the Bird"

"Penguin Cold Shoulders Libraries"

"'Let Them Eat (Fish) Cake' Penguin Tells Libraries"

"Question: What Do Penguins and Libraries Have in Common? Answer: Nothing"
"Penguin Wings Away from Libraries"
"March of the Penguins--and They're Carrying Away E-Books with Them"
"What's Black and White and Red All Over? It's No Longer a Penguin in a Library"
"'So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish'"--Penguin Leaves Libraries in Lurch